As many know I was fighting for my life 6  months ago but what most don’t know is that I was just Dying to breath, once again in the Hospital less that 14 weeks ago, Spending my Christmas Eve  being  stabbed with needles and back to back breathing treatments with this same Chronic Lung disease (RAD) and  if that wasn’t  enough , Pulmonary  Disease , Adult chronic asthma and many  more terrifying complications  that you’ll read about as I hoped not to fall into a coma during my stay. Many athletes were preparing themselves for the  March  2012 St. Louis Pro Show, weeks in advance and as  some thought I was in training and on Holiday vacation living life  instead I was fighting for my life Dying to Breath once again

                                                  CHRISTMAS EVE

                                                    “A TRUE WARRIOR is NOT AFRAID to LOSE”
After almost 2 weeks  in the intensive care unit and Cardiac floor , I finally was discharged for home recovery. At this time it would give me less than 9 weeks to prepare for the ST. Louis pro show, and the Arnold Classic where I was scheduled to appear at my sponsor’s booth “SPECIES Nutrition” a week before competition.  Due to the heavy medications that kept me alive I ballooned to  68 LBS. over weight , suffered from chronic joint pain, horrible acne on my face, back,  chest , shoulders etc. and numerous side affects that you will learn about as you read on. I was far away from looking half way healthy nor fit enough for an appearance at the Arnold Classic and definitely not near competition shape but I was determined to keep on with  what I had scheduled before being hospitalized. I just kept telling my self , “I’m a warrior and will fight for what I want,, I’m a warrior and wont let this bring me down.”
What’s the worse that can happen, ”I get sick and almost die”, well been there done that, had to face that twice in less than one year!  I swore to do my best  in my recovery and training. I wanted to show my kids that if you really want something, you have to work for it, Push yourself, “Believe in yourself  when others don‘t believe“. So I prepared for the  Arnold Classic in Ohio and the week after the St. Louis Pro show with less than 8 weeks away not  even including my recovery time, but I was determined to get on that stage even with such short prep time. 

                   SOTO Family                                Son Jesus               Son Ron

                                                                                              Not Knowing
How is it that someone who looks so fit and confidant cries herself to sleep. Well that’s what I did many nights when I was put back into the hospital less than 6  months after getting out. Remembering what I went through the last time I was there , the pain and the awful things my body had to endure just to keep me Alive, only 6 months ago and it  feels as if it was just yesterday.  Here I am in a single, cold hospital room dying to catch my breath at every inhale and exhale. At every moment  it gets harder and harder to breath as if a pillow was being held tighter upon my face with every breath.  The harder I try to breath the harder it gets to breath, Not knowing if this  last breath will be my last. Not knowing if this time I will come out of the hospital alive.
As many know I was fighting for my life 6 months ago with this same condition, Chronic  Lung disease ( RAD ) Reactive Air Disease, Pulmonary  Disease,  and If that wasn’t  enough, it caused me to also have  Adult chronic asthma. While at the hospital I was once again put  under heavy medications with horrible side effects that caused  many complications. I’m so confused, Not knowing how is it that the same medication that can put me in a coma is the same medication keeping me Alive.

During my stay,  my weight shot up 68 Lbs. within 5 days, causing extreme pain in my joints and my body hurt to the touch.  At times my blood pressure would rise  as high as 199/89.  My blood sugar would go over 267  “yeah that’s right“, I was having continuous breathing treatments every 3 hours, during the day and even during the night with no sleep and no rest. Even with the continuous breathing treatments my body was not responding. At the time doctors were going back and forth on  cutting me and doing  a Lung -Tricciottomy.  I was having these mini cardiac episodes. I was moved back into the Cardiac floor. I had a few specialist working  and doing their best to keep me from going into shock or worse a Coma. Once again here I am, Not Knowing if I would be alive tomorrow.

                                                          Dedication and DeterminationLess than 8 weeks , I had to recover and prepare for my appearance at the Arnold Classic along with my first pro show of the season.  I was determined to make it on that stage as fit as possible  looking as best as I can. I trained 3 hours in the morning plus my physical therapy and managed to train again after work another 2 hours  and in between all this still managed to run my  studio, Soto CPT- Fitness Studio.  I was working with clients on a 13hr  shift and also teaching  group cardio classes almost every night. I was exhausted  and worn down but yet Determined to get myself back in shape. I made sure to Dedicate time  for my training and my preparation of my food for the week. As I tell all my clients there never really isenough time but you have to make time. Even with my crazy hours I also had to manage or better yet make time for my husband and my 2 kids. 

           So here I was with tremendous stress, trying to balance my job , my family , my competitions and  My Life. It would drive me nuts when I had clients complain on how they worked their 8 hour job and still couldn’t manage their time to get to the gym or train outside with a brisk walk.  These same Clients with no kids, to have to go home to cook for and not even a pet they needed to walk  yet still they have the nerve to tell me that I’m lucky to look the way that I do . NO Not True at All.
It was  Dedication  and  Determination that got me here not luck , Not  genetics.
With Dedication and Determination anything is possible. I’m hoping to encourage others to push for what they want and get the results they‘re looking for. I mean really, if  it was easy, everyone would look good.   

                                                                www.speciesnutrition.com

The side effects from the medications were awful. Even with the extreme pain I was in,  I trained day and night and persevered. I made it to my Arnold Classic appearance pleased with the condition my body was in,  Putting in all the time and being able to get toned and get rid of all the weight but  I was still feeling horrible about the condition of my skin.  I felt embarrassed  to be seen and my self esteem was a bit low after seeing another side affect of the medication that was keeping me alive. On my face, neck, chest, shoulders, back, and pretty much every were  you lay your eyes on I had terrible bumps and acne. I had no control over these side effects, there was nothing I could do to fix the condition my skin was in but to just give my skin time to fade.

So here I am working at the Arnold Classic convention 2012 where hundreds of fans,friends and family are there to take pictures , video , photo shoots, you name it. Even though I put in the time and trained my ass off to where  I was very pleased  with the way my body was conditioned,  I still felt like I wanted to walk around with a huge turtle neck to hide my skin. What even made it worse  and hurt my feeling were how cruel others could be with some of the comments that  were made, assuming that there were other reasons for my skin condition. Making an ass of themselves, not bothering to take the time to get to understand,why my skin looked the way it did. why just so quick to judge , It was a double edged sword, the medication I had to take to keep me breathing also gave me these terrible  side effects. But yet here they were people assuming others reasons for my condition," IGNORENT " how cruel! Why not take the time to talk with me? Get to know me.  I would have been able to inform them that I was dying once again and underwent a serious amount of medication. Why not ask me instead of assuming? I just don’t get why people are this way. 

I really had a wonderful time at the Arnold Classic this year,always tons of fun!!, Glad I made it out of that hospital bed and up and moving, Got the chance to work with my new sponsor Species Nutrition and got to know my new species family :~)  Looking to working with them again.

One week after the Arnold Classic I made it to my IFBB St. Louis Physic Pro show. I hit the stage as proud as I could be ,,, with only 8 weeks of preparation including my recovery. Regardless of where the judges will place me I felt like a winner just stepping on that stage without the use of a wheelchair. After all I've been through again twice in one year fighting for my life, dying to breath again there was nothing that was going to stop me from rocking that stage. I had a great time and placed 6th.  I hope that my journey will encourage others to keep pushing for what they want. With dedication and Determination anything is possible.

           St. Louis Pro Show 2012

Thank you everyone for all your support and love , Live and love life and believe in yourself .... With dedication and determination anything is possible